


Don't leave Wakatoshi to his own devices

by golden_kaori



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Basically the tinder au lol, Can read as ushiten if you squint a little, M/M, Online Dating, Shiratori third year bonding, or yeah you don't need to squint a lot that's my bad, there's lots of bonding here, this is as far from problematic and angsty as it can get thank you next
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-07
Updated: 2019-01-07
Packaged: 2019-10-06 04:05:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17338256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/golden_kaori/pseuds/golden_kaori
Summary: Shiratorizawa's volleyball club is full of overprotective folk who involve themselves a little too much.





	Don't leave Wakatoshi to his own devices

**Author's Note:**

  * For [AwkwardPotatoChild](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AwkwardPotatoChild/gifts).



> This is a secret santa gift for our server exchange!   
> Annie I hope you enjoy this.

Getting into Shiratorizawa Academy was nothing short of a feat, be it for high school or a lower grade, the standards were set up at an incredible height where nothing but the very best were cherry-picked to carry the torch to represent not just Miyagi or Tohoku but Japan itself. Within the alumni were even worse cases, such as those who became representative athletes of any of the ridiculously intense and rigorous sports teams. The academic load and physical strain would be unfathomable to students from other schools. So no one, unless they experienced it first-handedly, would believe how much time they had to be dicking around

The cafeteria is filled with a bunch of regular teenagers, with their regular teenager dilemmas and dramas. All of them concerned with projects, dates, vacations, or whatever troubles their petty little lives. All of them save for one, one who seems undisturbed by the mundane affairs of living in a society. Or maybe there was more than one, but Satori only cares for this one.

“Wakatoshi,” Satori begins, uncertain about where his ideas will lead him but he’s always up for messing with his best friend for his own entertainment. “Isn’t it a little depressing that your only friends are team members?”

Wakatoshi doesn’t stir from his weird stoic concentration towards his food. It looks like he didn’t listen and Satori has no problem repeating himself but he refrains when Wakatoshi calmy sets his chopsticks aside. “Not at all, I find it convenient to involve myself with peers who are like-minded and with whom I share common goals.”

As expected; an organic grade S Wakatoshi branded response. If Satori didn’t know how ridiculously genuine his friend was he could swear he somehow has them prepared for an impromptu interview.

He comes up with something to throw back at him and push the conversation further, but he remembers they’re not alone. He refrains just barely when he catches the glance Semi shoots him from across the table. “Shut up Tendou, it’s not like you’re any different.” he retorts. Semi frowns and looks at Satori more directly before releasing a deep sigh. “Doesn’t mean either of you is doing anything wrong, we’re together most of the time in the gym or the dorms, it’s not a surprise.”

Semi most often than not cuts the chase with him pretty quickly and Satori respects that. “I never said it was wrong, it was nothing more than a reflection.” Bullshit, is probably what Semi thinks, and Satori isn’t going to correct him.

“Then,” Reon turns to Wakatoshi, purposefully ignoring the ongoing banter. “from what I gather it seems you’re wholly invested in the team’s affairs.”

“I’m the captain,” Wakatoshi says with unwavering confidence. “The well-being of the players is a top priority, and nurturing healthy relationships is the best way into building a solid foundation for the team.”

“Bingo!” Satori couldn’t have said better himself. “You need to nurture other kinds of relationships for a solid foundation of yourself.” He sighs in contentment and stretches his arms far behind himself.

When he comes back he can’t help but smirk, the look in Wakatoshi’s face is priceless. His eyebrows are slightly furrowed and his mouth is shut in deep thought, if Satori were so daring he would say it looks like a pout. Regardless, he knows he’s confused at having his own words reversed and is probably trying to find some kind of hidden meaning within them.

Reon cracks up, either from recognizing Satori’s genius or he also founds amusing the reaction from their composed friend. “Don’t tease him too much Tendou, I get your point but I don’t think dating is one of Ushijima’s interests.”

“Oh, so you were implying that” Wakatoshi’s face relaxes. “However Ohira is right, I hardly find dating something important right now, especially with how close we are to graduation now.” A smile tugs at his lips and he earnestly refers back to Satori. “I understand now you were merely concerned for me, I appreciate it.”

He would be slightly more annoyed at the callout –he does care for his friends but there’s no need to be so explicit about it– still, he has thought of something and it might be a good idea of bringing it up if solely for the need of feeling that he has the upper hand.

“Don’t completely refuse the idea. Can’t you imagine?” Satori wonders, with an airy and almost wistful tone. “Last day of school, little Toshi has grown fond of someone, maybe even without his knowledge. The cherry blossoms fall and with how formal he is he silently rips the second button of his uniform’s jacket and gives it to the object of his affections.”

“Huh,” Semi imagines too. “Too bad we don’t use a gakuran, sounds like an interesting scenario.”

“A small detail but does pose a hindrance.” Satori admits, _he should’ve gone to Seijou_ , but no, they have a similar uniform. _He should’ve gone to Karasuno._

“Is that all?” Reon asks almost posing a challenge, but the three of them know Satori well enough to know he hasn’t even begun.

“Are you really Benkei? We’re teenagers in the age of technology, who needs to get out and through trial and error and weeks or months of uncertainty find someone?” Satori is quick to retrieve his phone and display it as if he was doing a commercial. “And it’s not even about dating. This little device right here is the answer to your pleas with the swipe of a finger and the fair price of your eternal adoration.”

“Then why don’t you use it if it’s so foolproof?” Semi says out of courtesy, ready to escape from this conversation.

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves Semisemi, don’t take away my mastermind role just yet.” He replies with a pleasant smile.

They managed to avoid fueling Satori’s machinations for the rest of lunchtime and proceeded to return together to their respective classes. Wakatoshi falls into a steady pace next to Satori while the other two speed up and dissolve into the crowd.

The silence between them was comfortable even for Satori so it was a genuine surprise when Wakatoshi spoke up. “I would lie if I said I would’ve given any of this a second thought if you hadn’t brought it up. But you’re my best friend and I’m willing to try as long as it doesn’t interfere with my routine.”

Was it Christmas already? Satori could swear he hears jolly chimes.

 

* * *

 

Satori snaps a picture of an unsuspecting Wakatoshi currently going over what he thought of this practice and what he expects to improve in the next one. There’s no flash or sound to give him away and Satori gets a perfect image of what Wakatoshi represents. Confidence, poise, morale, and he decides to add it to the profile he just made.

He knows Wakatoshi’s school email, he’s got his birthday memorized. Location? They basically live together. Wow, it would be so easy to steal someone’s identity and catfish horny idiots, but that’s not his objective at the moment.

Satori waits quietly outside of the locker room for Wakatoshi, he stares up at the ceiling and considers his motives. Why does he even bother? He knows this is only just a novelty and an excuse to try and push his best friend out of his comfort zone. He already had his character arc where everyone realized he’s soft and wants his friends to be happy but he isn’t actually sure this will benefit anyone.

Wakatoshi comes out and looks at Satori, not surprised or bothered by having company on the way back to the dorms.

“Well, you’ve humored me so let’s get this done.” Satori clears his throat and unlocks his phone back into the info screen. “Do you have any preference with being shown men or women?”

“I don’t see why I should avoid one or the other, that would only limit the chances of finding someone who would I share an interest.” Makes sense, and rather predictable.

“Maximum distance? Let’s max it out, we want to get you out of school at least.” Wakatoshi doesn’t seem to want to correct Satori so he continues to answer how he guesses would work best. “Now tell me about you Wakatoshi, not for me but for the bio.” The sun was setting and it gave a nice golden tint to Wakatoshi’s thoughtful form so he took another pic.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Did you know that...
> 
> ... this whole thing was written in comic sans?  
> ... I'm realizing just now how fun it is to write from Tendou's pov?  
> ... this is full of references to the gc lol I couldn't help that one.
> 
> ANNIE you're so great and always blessing us with headcanons and analysis, I hope I give back even if just a fraction. This is far from the end but I realized I at least upload something so I don't leave you hanging. Lots of love <3


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